Did you regret quitting your job to be a stay at home mom?

Best choice I ever made! I could never imagine having a complete weirder raise my children. Sure we struggle a bit more finacially, but I’d rather have no money and my kids know their mother and delight in life so much more, than to have all the money in the world and not know my own kids.

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not for one second

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Not at all. I like being home with my kids. I worked for a while when my youngest was about 8 months ancient. It was dreadful! I missed being with them so much. I’m glad that I’m home again with them!

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Well I didn’t quit, I was fired from my job 3 days before I had my son because my boss didn’t want to deal with maternity leave. I was plotting on returning to work as soon as possible, then I held my modest boy.

I am and have always been a fiercely independent female. I was raised believing that women are SUPPOSED to work and that staying home to raise your kids is bone idle. It honestly took me about 2 total years to settle into being a SAHM. I felt like I lost my indentity, my frankness, my independence. It was very hard for me to adjust and I fought it for a very long time which only made matter worse on me.

I finally chose to sit back and realize what I was doing for my kids, what advantages I was giving them and chose to sacrifice all of my wants and desires, all of my personal issues, to give them the best life possible. I am now perfectly at concord with being a SAHM and I like what I do. It’s not simple and if you try to hold on to the person you are now, it will make it even more hard on you.

It is a LIFE changing choice. You have to be willing to completely lose yourself in your children and live for them and for them only. We are such a selfish society anymore and the stereotypes of SAHM’s don’t help at all. You have to be completely willing to sacrifice your life for that child. My 4 year ancient starts Pre-K in a few months and I’m gonna be devastated. I have 2 more years for the modest one to go though. We are doing a wonderful thing for our children and they will be so thankful that we took this time for them. That is the payoff.

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I did when it got to winter and I was stuck in the house. That was the first year. Now my son will be 2 soon and we are expecting another one and I don’t regret it at all. Make sure you do occupy yourself with different actions and get out and meet other moms that stay home. Helps you to have a support network when you have terrible days and feel lik eyou are climbing the walls. It was a huge adjustment in the beginning, mostly because I didn’t have a lot of adult interactions but I joined kindermusik and my library has a free storytime weekly and that made it a lot better. And nothing compares to seeing every cute thing your child does and getting to witness all the firsts. I don’t like to share my son with anyone, even daddy, so I reckon I wouldn’t be able to handle someone else taking care of him. I might just be a crazy mom but staying hom was the best choice.

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You need to consider the huge picture when making this choice.

My wife and I both work and we have two kids in daycare. Here are times when we wish one of us could stay home. Trying to manage a career, our kids, and keep the house up is very hard and draining physically and emotionally. If one of the kids is sick, we take turns staying home with them.

The Pros of working are:
- Reduced financial risk. If one parent loses a job, not all of the income is gone.
- Augmented financial security – you can save money to meet your family’s goals…society funds, retirement, reduction of debt, etc..
- You can take up again advancing your career and being marketable. You can take advantage of 401k plans, annual pay raises to increase your earnings, etc…

Cons are….
- It can be hard to get doctors appointments that work for you and your job. Seems like they always have doctors appointments in the middle of the day…rarely at the end of the day or early morning.
- It’s hard to manage your job and take care of the kids when the kids are sick.
- Here are times when you feel you are missing out on the kid’s early years.

We have a fantastic daycare with low teacher income rates and a phenominal center. We are confident that we made the right scale. Had we placed the kids in a lesser center, I might have more reservations. So, it’s vital to find excellent feature care.

I will also tell you that sometimes, stay at home mothers on our block give us the cold shoulder or hurtful explanation about how they don’t need to send their kids to daycare and how they are going to raise their own kids. We write these observations off due to insecurities on their parts.

Our kids are doing fantastic. We couldn’t come up with as fascinating or as creative projects for them to do. They are socially advanced and learning equipment at a much before rate than my wife and I did at their age.

We want our kids to be able to go to society and we don’t want them to be completely in debt when they get out. We also want to show them that both mothers and fathers can have careers and be successful in business. We also want them to learn. We have made the best choice for our family. Ultimately, its up to you to choose what is best for you and your family. You can always try going to work and see how equipment go and you can always quit later.

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I just had my first in Development….I quit my job when I first found out I was pregnant. I like staying home with him. I could not imagine leaving him at daycare and taking the chance of missing his first word….or him rolling over for the first time. It would eat my heart away knowing someone else seen his firsts before me. Also all the work and time he needs plus house work…if I was subdue working I reckon I would go crazy!! And you don’t have to stay home 24/7….we go places all the time…out to the park, walk nearly the mall..etc. I am 24 and was working at a grocery store part time….if I was subdue working my total check would go to pay for day care. So why even work when i can watch him since I would not have the money anyways. guess that makes sense?? lol….My husband is the one that works and granted we aren’t rolling in money up to our ears but we are pleased and that is what matters. If you are pleased to stay with your baby so be it…if you would rather work and place him/her in daycare then so be it. It is a huge choice to make…but here is always other jobs…may not be the same one but if you ever wanted to work again you could find work elsewhere. Just make a list of your pros and cons and see which one wins! But I do not regret leaving work at all….I hear how miserble everyone else is that subdue works here and I do not miss it! Best of luck to you and your choice and excellent luck with the baby.

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I struggled with the same choice. I had place myself through society, eating Ramen noodles and drinking water. By the time my husband and I were expecting our first child it was a modest hard to just “let it all go” to stay at home. BUT, here was a part of me that really wanted to be a full time mom too! My husband was supportive either way so I chose to be converted into a SAHM.

I LOVED it for the first few weeks. Then I Despised it for a few months. But I have to blame myself for that. I allowable myself to start to feel “worthless” and “unneccessary”. I started to resent the fact that my business suits were collecting dust in my closet and that I was basically a “walking napkin” for my modest girl. To top equipment off, I got pregnant again when she was only 4 months ancient…so I really felt BAREFOOT, PREGNANT, and STUCK IN THE KITCHEN….as they say.

That was 8 years ago. I am Subdue a SAHM and I Like IT. I’ll try to save you alot of anguish and heartache by telling you how NOT to do what I DID incorrect.

1. Don’t reckon that you have to be perfect straight away! It’s going to take a modest while to “get into your groove”. I thought I could keep a nice smelling baby in cute pink outfits 24/7 as well as a clean house, with supper on the table by 5pm…all while looking like I did when I worked professionally. HA! Didn’t happen! When it didn’t happen, I thought I failed and wasn’t any excellent at being a SAHM…..but what it REALLY was….I just hadn’t found my “groove” yet. It took a couple of years for that!

2. Don’t lose YOURSELF! When my daughter was born I lived nearly HER schedule. Then 13 months later my son was born and I had a newborn and a 1 y/o to Trail with. I forgot what I liked. I lived on poptarts and Barney! NO WONDER I FELT LIKE CRAP! haha People would tell me “you just need some time to yourself”. But I thought that was being a “terrible mom”. I couldn’t leave a newborn and a 1 y/o…..for goodness sakes…they NEEDED ME! So, I burned myself out and finished up hating being a SAHM, though I wouldn’t admit it. I finally chose if I didn’t get some “ME TIME” here wouldn’t be much “ME” left. So I let the grandparents start watching the kids on weekend nights occasionally while my hubby and I went out. It was hard at first, but with awhile I was even calling Nana to watch them so I could grocery shop on my own! The breaks really made a difference in my attitude.

3. Subdue do what you Delight in! It will probably be awhile before you will have time or before you will even WANT to pick up your ancient leisure activity or start a new one. BUT, once the kids are ancient enough to play on their own, give them a modest space and do a touch that YOU delight in. Read, draw, write, play an instrument, Dexterity……whatever it is…..don’t live day to day JUST doing equipment for everyone else. I tried that and it finished up making me CRAZY! I subdue like taking care of my family. BUT, I take care of them BETTER when I take care of myself too.

Delight in being a SAHM. Being a mom really is the most worthwhile job in the world! Just take care of yourself too.

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Here are ways to cheat. You can get involved in equipment everywhere you can take your child. Volunteer for equipment in your town. Get a part time job that has hours outisde of your hubby’s for maybe 2 days a week. Get a job at a gym that has daycare.

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Read the book, “Home by Scale: Raising Emotionally Secure Children in an Insecure World” by Brenda Hunter, Ph.D. It drastically changed how I look at being a stay at home mom.

Here will be days when you wonder why you are wasting all your talents being at home, making pb&j sandwiches and wiping modest rear ends. But the work that a mother puts in at home has more enduring, long-term and influential consequences than ANYTHING else she can do.

“Any female who gives her child her heart, her time, and her presence is giving him a priceless gift. She is shaping her child’s self-concept and instruction him lessons about like and intimacy that last a lifetime.”

“The link a childish child has with his mother is unique, without parallel, established unalterably for a total lifetime as the first and strongest like object and the prototype of all later like relationships.”

“Here are mothers who are home by scale, providing their children with their continuous presence and like. These mothers are home because the know that they, and not a child-care provider, can best nurture their children and give them a sense of home. They know that children thrive in their mother’s presence and suffer greatly if they are too often absent.”

“A child needs to be intensley loved and cared for by someone who won’t pack up and leave at five o’clock. That someone is the child’s mother.”

Really, read this book and you will NOT regret staying at home to mother your baby. She talks a lot about the effects of separation on babies and the long-term effects of infant daycare. You will see your at-home mothering as THE MOST VALUABLE thing you could possibly be doing. The investment in your child will be worth every every every second.

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